Pinned toot

hey, just went up again. cool.
follow me @webweaver, it's my main.

everyone on Tinder is looking for a partner in crime to go world traveling with, and yet when i show up with sniper rifles, grappling hooks, and a folder of fake passports for both of us, i'm the weird one

Im trying to figure if Ive done that before and its ridiculous that we drew imaginary lines on a grinder.

food Show more

food Show more

I'm pretty good with hair clippers as long as I'm not using them on myself. hmu if you need a buzz.

still the best parody lyrics I ever came up with are:

"I push my needle into my THIGHS!"

when I gave myself an e shot.

weed mention Show more

food Show more

not sure why watermelon dragonfruit gum is coloured blue, tbh. doesn't really make sense.

imagine if instead of dumping billions into self-driving cars we invested a little in our public transportation

You know you're a monster fucker when literally just a skeleton looks hot

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Queer Party!

A silly instance of Mastodon for queer folk and non-queer folk alike. Let's be friends!
Note for folks coming from Tumblr; NSFW content is allowed here, but you must tag your posts as NSFW, and provide a clear content warning for them! NSFW profile pictures or banners, or explicit usernames/display names are not allowed. Please keep it friendly!