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Hi! tumblr is dying so I'm checking this place out. My name is Jess. I'm a 30 y.o. woman. but prefers ladies. , traveler, romantic. keeps me going. I love , , , , , and .

I sat near two Trumpsters at the coffee shop. One of them said that the only newspaper they trust now is the National Enquirer, because Trump's friend runs it. I was just sitting there, writing on my laptop, but they kept glancing at me like they thought I'd pounce on them and rip off their faces.

This photo offended some uptight people on Facebook. How is making fun of an accidental fire that killed no one and did moderate damage to a church roof off-color?

I am officially approved to move into an apartment with a chill, friendly coworker that is right next to my job! YESSSSSSS! No more living with ex!

I accidentally paid OKCupid $50 because I didn't read the fine print. That's what I did today 🙃

Today I tried making an OKCupid profile, and gave up halfway through "Introduce yourself" 🙃

Remember that Strokes video where Julian Casablancas was making love to the sidewalk? 😍

alpacajess boosted

You all need to give me shit until I go out and take a road trip

Oh wait, Mastodon doesn't show a preview. It's The Strokes - First Impressions of Earth. Great album

This album slaps so hard, thanks YouTube for helping me rediscover it 🖤

alpacajess boosted

"Blows It On Cocaine And..."

and what? Breast augmentation?

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Queer Party!

A silly instance of Mastodon for queer folk and non-queer folk alike. Let's be friends!
Note for folks coming from Tumblr; NSFW content is allowed here, but you must tag your posts as NSFW, and provide a clear content warning for them! NSFW profile pictures or banners, or explicit usernames/display names are not allowed. Please keep it friendly!