trans folk i’ve not spent time with in person/irl:

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Hold me closer, crazy diamond

Put your ray gun to my head

@Aleums In other news, margarine consumption clearly correlates with the divorce rate in Maine.

The knight and the dragon fought.
"Hold!" the princess called. "Why do you fight?"
They looked ashamed, and the princess spotted two trampled bouquets.
"Were those for me?"
The knight and the dragon nodded.
"Girls," the princess said, smiling at them, "what if I date you both?"
#MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

Cannibalism, food, meat, shitpost 

*sobbing, eating my sandwich*

“M-my bologna h-has a first name”

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dating app shitpost 

Why do you want to block this person?

⚪️ Advertising / Spam
⚪️ Harassment / Abuse
⚪️ Under 18
🔘 White Girl With Dreadlocks

Day 3: red gimp pins arrived from England and all packaging was sprayed generously with alcohol, loose trim secured. Only options available in the US were a hot glue gun or ornamental brass tacks. I wonder how much longer til I tik-tok?

work cynicism 

So many people at work are convinced, despite all the evidence, that contact with co-workers is good for our mental health.

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Queer Party!

A silly instance of Mastodon for queer folk and non-queer folk alike. Let's be friends!