Why was Pavlov's hair so soft? 

He conditioned it!

A spaceship landed in the park. An alien emerged, looked around, and walked up to the nearest person. Me.
It held my hand gently, patted me on the shoulder, and said "There, there, it'll work out".
Then it left.
It's silly, but I do feel better now.
#MicroFiction #TootFic #SmallStories

Don't eat the rich. Humans contain a lot of toxins that are harmful to humans, and eating them doubles up on that. Also they contain (obviously enough) human vector diseases that you can catch in a way eating another species you wouldn't necessarily; Compost the rich and use them to grow other crops instead.

Everytime I come back to mastodonte there are like ten new inside jokes I don't get and it's very weird.

Heyyyyyy kids, I may be dirt dogshit poor right now, but the good news is that there's no better time for you to get art! My infinitely benevolent friend @bewitchyourmind is doing commissions on my behalf rn, which as far as I understand it means that you get art and I get money. Check out their portpholio and pls boost for exposure! instagram.com/bewitcharts/

“But it’s just a bit white canvas with a black dot on it.”

“Yes, yes. It’s a period piece.”

Hi grad school is killing me and my practicum is starting soon and *screams into the void*

So anyway I forgot about mastodon again but only because I forgot everything but stress

swift from raki.social is a massive follow bot that isn’t listed as one. I would block if I were you.

Asking over here too, anyone know of more SRS surgeons I should look into?

I made this skull shawl a few years ago, and if anyone is looking for something to #crochet before Halloween, A+ can recommend this pattern. (It's free and not too difficult if you have experience with lace or granny squares.) ravelry.com/patterns/library/s

stalking the hotel lobby in hopes my grandparents come down for breakfast.

I haven't tooted any photos of Kochka yet. Here he is!!! 💕💕💕

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Queer Party!

A silly instance of Mastodon for queer folk and non-queer folk alike. Let's be friends!